I Don't Do 8 Legs.
Wednesday, September 23, 2009 Posted In Momma Mia Edit This 8 Comments »
I'm driving. Tots are snug in their seats behind me. I flip the sun visor down. Something black, the size of a dime falls in my lap. Something with 8 legs. HOLY MOTHER-F-ING SHIT! THERE'S A SPIDER ON ME. HOLY SH*T! I slam the truck into park, regardless of the fact that I haven't properly braked yet. I can't get out of the truck fast enough. I'm slapping myself. My fingers hurt. My legs hurt. The console of the truck would hurt if it had feelings. I'm out of the truck. I don't see anything. I'm peering into the truck ever so carefully. I see nothing. I get back in the truck. We're going. I'm freaking out. Where the hell did it go? A spider doesn't disappear into thin air. I'm driving, shoving my hands into the back of my pants everywhere time I move and think I feel something. I'm dancing around like a blooming idiot, sure that there is a spider ready to launch it's attack.
We're home now. No other sign of that-thing-with-8-legs. Could have been a black piece of fuzz. But how did it get in my truck? Could have been my imagination. But I'm not completely delusional. Yet. So I'm keeping the windows of my truck up when it's parked somewhere, fearful of another 8-legged attack.
Now my question is this, will a spider die in a truck because it will have nothing to eat? I mean surely it will, right?! RIGHT????
***
And for something not so comical, my mom's cancer is now in both lungs. Suck-Freaking-*ss.
We're home now. No other sign of that-thing-with-8-legs. Could have been a black piece of fuzz. But how did it get in my truck? Could have been my imagination. But I'm not completely delusional. Yet. So I'm keeping the windows of my truck up when it's parked somewhere, fearful of another 8-legged attack.
Now my question is this, will a spider die in a truck because it will have nothing to eat? I mean surely it will, right?! RIGHT????
***
And for something not so comical, my mom's cancer is now in both lungs. Suck-Freaking-*ss.
8 comments:
Surely it will die!! Dang spider!
So sorry to hear about your mom. My prayers are with her
Sure, it'll die. After it makes webs all over your vents and crap. Creepy little bastards.
So sorry about your mom, Dawn.
Thanks for the nice comment. I'm guessing it will die. It probably fell out when you jumped out.
Sorry about your mom. We will keep her in our prayers.
Spiders are horrible this year! It's crazy! Thanks for the laugh!
Weldon probably won't drive the truck for a week now! hahahaa!!! j/k! :)
HATE HATE HATE SPIDERS with you! Yes it has to die - but do your kiddo's leave in crumbs in the truck? Those things are LITTLE they don't need a lot to eat! LOL! :)
So sorry to hear about your mom! Please keep us posted.
So sorry about your mom. Mine had breast cancer. Luckily after removing one breast and doing chemo and dialysis she is fine now. Stay strong :)
Wish some really smart person would come up with cures for cancer.
As for the spiders, looks like you share my freaked out fear of spiders. I'm the crazy woman running around swatting at myself also, I'd even go as far as getting my clothes off to make sure it's not anywhere on me. Screaming and all. The two worst times was once when I was a kid a spider scared me so bad that I ended up vomiting because of the fear, and the second is when I went to go and kill a spider and it took off and was laying a bunch of babies while it was running and they were all scattering all over the place..talk about pure horror.
I'm sure it will die. Spiders tend to die of loneliness and starvation...
I'm sorry to hear about your mom!
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